I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
