it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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