Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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