It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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