covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize