Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
either way he was missing a nipple.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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