She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
