Reggie can tackle my bush.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
