im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
