I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
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