Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
