He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
