that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
