OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
