watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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