We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
there was a trapeze. enough said
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
