3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
