Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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