Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Don't make out with my wife yet
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize
