Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
