When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
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