that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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