just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.�
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
