do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
