i jhust puked up my retainher.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
