So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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