Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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