Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
