he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
