So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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