but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
