Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
