Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize