Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
