i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Randomize
