Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize