Jerry, you need to find god
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
they need to just BURY HIM!
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
We have started to decorate penises.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
