Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
your like the ambassador to my penis.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
