Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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