North Korea, Best Korea!
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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