are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
