Porn is love you can see.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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