do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
