My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
It was confusing and full of hummus
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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