i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Randomize
