okay pat passed out under dana's car
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
