i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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