So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
