Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
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