do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Randomize
